In Different Ways

[A] [A7]
[A]I can see it in your eyes girl
That you're [C#m]in the mood for love
So I [F#m]light some candles, pour some wine
C[D]ome sit down on the[E] rug

[A]But there's something I must tell you, babe
[C#m]Before we take this step
[F#m]Something about me girl
Tha[D]t you do not know[E] yet

[A]I have no penis  [A7]

It was torn off
In a bicycle[D] accident
In nineteen ninet[A]y nine
I also lost one[E] testicle
So all I have is a weird [D]uni-ball
And a rubber tube, between [A]my legs
[E]But babe, I can love you in differe[A]nt ways

[A] [A7]
I[A]'ll make love to you with the rubber tube
That I [C#m]use for urinating
I'll jus[F#m]t tape to Popsicle sticks around it
[D]Make it easier for penetr[E]ating

[A]And having only one ball
Isn't [C#m]always a bad thing
It's like a[F#m] pool ball in a pillow case
It's like a [D]cherry on a sund[E]ae

'Cause girl
I have no [A]penis
I have [A7]no cock
If it looks like I[D] have a ball
Just 'cause I stuff it with a[A] sock
Girl, I know that y[E]ou're afraid
But I promise, baby, if[D] you stay
That I'll put a cucumber in the[A] microwave
And [E]babe, I will love you in different...
[A].[A].[A].[D] [D]w[A]a[A]y[A]s[D] [D]

[A]Just because I don't have cock
[D]It doesn't mean I [A]can't rock
[A]Just because I don't have cock
[A]It doesn't mean I can't [D]rock
[D]O-o-oh yeah[A]

m