Ironic

[D]My dog's stomach was[A] very upset,
[D]So I put him in the car [A]and we went to the vet.
[D]And on our way to the[A] vet,
I killed a cat[D]. [A]   [D]
I said isn't that ironic[D]? [A]   [D]

[D]I adopted a child from [A]over seas,
[D]to rescue him from child labor [A]factories,
And[D] on his very first [A]birthday we went to Build-A-Bear Worksho[D]p.[A]  [D]
i[D]sn't that [A]ironic [D]
                  [D]        [G]      [D]       [A]
I said isn't that I-R-O-N-I-C-I-N-O-R-I-R-O-N-I-C?

[D]A water-park is [G]burnt to the ground,
[D]And a toe-truck has [A]broken down.
[D]I always use to [A]cry when I laughed,
[D]and then I was malested by a clown. [D]   [G]     [D]       [A]
Isn't that ironic?[D]  [A]    [D]

(Get the idea?)( The only change is the key change were all chords go two semitones up )

I was watching Al Gore on CNN,
He was talking, and talking, and talking,
and then,
Out of boredom, my pet polar bear shot himself.

I dated an animal rights activist,
and one day she got really pissed,
Because I was eating veal,
That was wrapped in pita (PETA) bread.

Isn't that I-R-O-N-I-C-I-N-O-R-I-R-O-N-I-C?

I'm a stand up comic and I always sit and slouch,
And I got my girlfriend pregnant on my sterile uncle's pull-out couch.

If everyday you play the board-game Risk,
You probably never taken a risk in your life.
And Monopoly has far from the stranglehold on the board game market.
A little kid died from suffocation, when he choked a game piece from Operation.
And I can't grow a beard.
That one's not ironic, that one's just sad.

Bob Barker got all of my pets pregnant.

My grandfather had Alzheimer's and one day we were...