Fat Children

[Am]Do not feed dou[G]ghnuts to your obe[F]se children      [Em]
[Am]You will regr[G]et it when they’r[F]e in their teens    [Em]
[Am]Maccas might shut [G]them up now that t[F]hey’re seven            [Em]
But th[F]ey won’t forgive you, when
[Em]They’re getting picked last for PE        [Am]
[Bm7]Don’t you see?

[Am]Boombalata motherfucker
[D9]Have you noticed that your kids are fat[Dm]?
[Am]What are you going to do about that?        [D7]
[Am]What are you going to do?

[Am]So you telling me that your family [D7]
[Am]Has a history of obesi[D7]ty
You got a polycy[Am]stic ovary   [D7]
[Am]It’s just the way that God made me[D7]

[Am]It’s unlikely, [D7]statistically
To be a physi[Am]cal thing
But either way [D7]it don’t explain why you
Are in the cue [Am]at Burger King

You can blame[Am] it on biology[D7]
You can blame[Am] your physiology      [D7]
You can point[Am] to genealogy     [D7]
And your soci[Am]al anthropology    [D7]

You can say yo[Am]u are an ectomorph       [D7]
That you just [Am]can’t get the kilos off       [D7]
Well you can be what [Bm7]you wanna be
But stop feeding that boy KFC              [E7]

He we[F]ighs 40 kilos and he’s only three
He lo[Bm7]oks like a clean-shaven Pavarotti             [E7]

[F]Switching to Diet Coke is not the way [C]back
[G]Boombalata kiddie-stuffer
Your kid[D]’s a fat, have you noticed that?
[Am]And you oughta be ash[F]amed    [G]
For you only [Am]have yourself to b[F]lame.   [G]

Your 5 ye[F]ar old princess in her size 14 tutu             [C]
[G]Only eats pizza like that b[D]ecause you do       [E7]
Will be dead [C]of a heart attack
Befor[G]e your grandchildren are ten           [C]                   [G]
Perha[C]ps you’ll consider
A cu[G]t-back on extra fries then       [C]                [G]

[Am]Boombalata kiddie-stuffer
[D9]Have you noticed that your kids are fat[Dm]?
[Am]What are you going to do about that?        [D7]
[Am]What are you going to do?

[Am]So you telling me that your family [D7]
[Am]Has a history of obesi[D7]ty
You got a polycy[Am]stic ovary   [D7]
[Am]It’s just the way that God made me[D7]

[Am]But – and in you[D7]r case
There’s a reaso[Am]nably big butt     [D7]
Do you think[Am] it’s an appropriate treat       [D7]
The all-you-can-eat at Piz[Am]za Hut?       [D7]

There’s no excuse[Am] you silly goose     [D7]
For a chi[Am]ld with a caboo[D7]se
Like a moo[Am]se who’s eaten too much mousse            [D7]
It’s t[Am]antamount to child abuse    [D7]

Kick them off the[Am] fucking couch    [D7]
Unpl[Am]ug the Playstati[D7]on
Send them down to[Am] the park      [D7]
If they don’t wanna [Am]go, make ’em [D7]

[Am]Tell them they have to jog    [D7]
Until their jog[Am]ging shorts fit’em[D7]
If they he[Am]sitate, ask firml[D7]y
If they sti[Am]ll resist, hit’em

Is t[F]his what you want for your little girl a[C]nd guy?
These chip[G]s off the pork chop, for the toffee apples of [D]your eye?
[F]Six packs of kit cats are not the way[C] back
[G]Boombalata Kiddie-Stuffer
Your kids[D] are fat, did ya notice that?

[Am]And you, you ought to be ashame[F]d        [G]
[Am]For you have only got yourself to bla[F]me       [G]
Your 6 y[F]ear old miniature Jabba the Hu[C]t
Eating hal[G]f melted Mars Bars from the folds of his gut [D]
He'll be dead[C] of an aneurysm
Befor[G]e his own children ism ten         [C]                 [G]
Perha[C]ps you’ll consider
A cu[G]t-back on Taco Bell then         [C]                   [G]
Perh[C]aps you’ll consider
A cu[G]t-back on Krispy Kreme doughnuts         [C]
And Popcorn in bucket-si[G]zed boxes
And mic[C]rowave pizza or drive through[G] McDonalds
For wee[C]knightly dinners in front of the[G] TV
And note[C]s to the phys-ed instructor s[G]aying
Timmy has asthma [C]but he really just gets short of br[G]eath
Cos he’s 35 kil[C]os above the ideal weight [G]
Of 35[C] kilos for a nine y[G]ear old boy       [C]