Pigs Cant Swim

[G]I once had a pig that [D]loved me.
He lived in a shed in the [G]country.
In a middle class district of [C]Dunfries.
[D]But a sad kind of pig was [G]he.

[G]Pigs can't swim and [D]pigs can't fly
But Pigs can see the [G]wind go by.
Pigs make lovely [D]household friends.
When winter comes then [G]summer ends.

[G]Each week that lofty [D]beasty -
Would beg with eyes so [G]misty.
To take him over to [C]England.
[D]His life's dream to [G]fulfill.

[G]He wants to plunge into the [D]channel
Swim to France would be his [G]gamble
Florence Chadwick couldn't hold a [C]candle
[D]To such a daring pig as [G]he.

(This verse sung in pigs perspective - silly falsetto)
[G]So then I came up to him [D]askin'
will our friendship not be [G]lastin'
and he told me I was [C]graspin'
[D]and he needed to be [G]free!

[G]So will you take me there [D]tomorrow
In a pigs eye I said with [G]sorrow
So he drown himself in the [C]bath tub (Naughty Boy)
[D]And I had pork chops with my [G]tea!

[G]Early in the [D]morning
so early in the [G]morning
so early in the [C]morning
[D]before the break of [G]day