This Is Hell

[D]This is hell, th[A]is is hell,[G] I am sorry t[Em]o tell you
It nev[D]er gets better o[A]r worse    [Em7]              [A]
[D]But you get used to [A]it, after a[G] spell     [Em]
For heaven [D]is hell in [A]reverse[Cadd9]

The bruiser[G] spun a hula hoop
As all the barmen [D/A]preen and pout
The neon "[G]I" of "night club" flickers
[D/A]On an off and finally blew out        [C]
The irritating jingle of the [Am]belly dancing phoney turkish girl          [C]
The eerie glare of ultraviolet pe[Am]rfect dental work

[D]This is hel[A]l, I am sor[G]ry to tell [Em]you
It nev[D]er gets better o[A]r worse    [Em7]              [A]
[D]But you get used to [A]it, after a[G] spell     [Em]
For heaven [D]is hell in [A]reverse[Cadd9]

The failed[G] Don Juan in the big bow-tie
Is very sorr[D/A]y that he spoke
For he?s m[G]islaid his punchline more than
[D/A]Halfway through a very tasteless joke            [C]
The Fr?ulein caught him peeking down her gown        [Am]
He?s yelling in her ear       [C]
And all at once the music stopped          [Am]
As he was intimately bellowing "My dear[A]..."

This is hell[D], this is hell, [A]I am sorry [G]to tell you[Em]
It nev[D]er gets better o[A]r worse    [Em7]              [A]
[D]But you get used to [A]it, after a[G] spell     [Em]
For heaven [D]is hell in [A]reverse[Cadd9]

The shi[Dm]rt you wore with courage       [G]
And the violent n[C]ylon suit       [F]
Reapp[Dm]ear upon your back        [G]
And undermine [C]the polished line             [F]
You try to shoot, [Dm]it?s not the torment       [G]
Of the flames t[C]hat finally see your fl[F]esh corrupted            [D]
It?s the small humiliation that your memory piles up                      [G]
This is he[Em7]ll, this is hell[D]

"My favourit[G]e thing" is playing again an again [D]
But it?[G]s by Julie Andrews and not by John Colt[D]rane
Endles[G]s balmy breezes and perfect sunsets fram[D]ed
Vinta[G]ge wine for breakfast and naked starlets flo[D]ating in Champagne                       [C]
All the passions of your youth        [Am]
Are tranquilised and tamed        [C]
You may think it looks familiar      [Am]
Though you may know it by another name [A]

This is hell[D], this is hell, [A]I am sorry [G]to tell you[Em]
It nev[D]er gets better o[A]r worse    [Em7]              [A]
[D]But you get used to [A]it, after a[G] spell     [Em]
For heaven [D]is hell in [A]reverse[Cadd9]
This is hell, this is hell.   [D]
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